15 April 2006

u koment?! yes!

for assistance in how to read ZUMEL/zacanese, check out the first post here

sō stedmun wux nīs enuf tū lēv ā koment on mī nūborn blog. and haw swēt şē wux tū. uparentlē, zakunēz wiţ ţe modifīd leterz and ol iz varē klos tū sum drunken ē-mālz ī'v sent her in ţe past. gūd tū nō sum ţingz never çānj.

ī'm sō bord. at ţe varē lēst, ī wont tū lēv werk and pak or nap or sumţing tū okyupī mī hed, sō tīm duzn't drag on wers ţan it olredē iz.

ītinerarē:
  • lēv vīzag at 2:10pm on 17-āpril and arīv in hīdrubad at 3:10pm

  • lēv hīdrubad at 5:20pm and get tū delē at 7:20pm

  • lēv delē at 10:45pm and get to newerk ārport at 4:35am on 18-āpril (15 owr, 10 minut flīt)

  • gō tū ţe konsūlut at 9:15am tū drop of mī pasport tū get mī nū vēzu.

  • dik urownd ol dā

  • pik up pasport at 4:30pm and tāk ā taksē tū newerk ārport

  • lēv newerk at 7:30pm and get tū pitsberg at 9:04pm

ThuMom and ThuMom2 şūld bē thār tū pik mē up ţen. and ī'l bē sōōōōō hapē. sō ţat i ţe plan. wē'l sē haw wel it gōz.

sē yū sūn.

13 April 2006

man ī kan't wāt tū get hōm

for assistance in how to read ZUMEL/zacanese, check out the first post here

ī wuz akçūulē ubowt 5 minutz lāt tūdā. ī wuz dresd, tēţ bruşd, redē tū gō, but ī had tū lūk at mī tikets wun mor tīm. ţā ar sō bēūtifūl. ī'm sō mir ţan redē tū get ţe hel owt uv hēr. ī definitlē nēd sum tīm of. it iz gōing tū bē grāt.

ī hav ā list uv ţingz ī nēd tū dū wen ī get hōm. simpul stuf līk gō tū ţe sinemu, ōpen ol uv mī bokses filing mī rūm, plā wiţ wutever iz in ţos bokses, gō drinking wiţ mī frendz, çil, gō tū ţe titē bar, and ēt gūd umarikun fūd.

in uţer nūz, ī'm ţinking uv geting ā pda. ţe mek ta onsīt wunts wun, and askd mē tū fīnd him wun (uparentlē hē ţinks ī'm a tek gūrū sins ī'm olwāz bīing gajets). sō ī'm lūking and ţār ar sum nis wunz. ī'm lūking at ţe (pardun ţe volger plān ingliş) palm tungsten C and ţe HP iPaq hx2750. mē līkē. mē hav tū menē toēz.

ţat's enuf for ā dēsent pōst.

12 April 2006

sō wut dū yū ţink

for assistance in how to read ZUMEL/zacanese, check out the first post here

haw iz everēwun līking ţis sīt? ī nō it iz nū, but ī ţink it wil kach on. it iz ţe hīt uv ēfişunsē, and uglē az ol get owt. ţis wuz gōing tū bē longer but ī wuz distrakted bī "tū pīnts uv loger (and ā paket uv krisps)". sorē ol. ī rēlē wunt tū giv yū ā big pōst tū fūlē uprēşēāt ţe bēūtē ţat iz... zakunēz. mābē tūmorō.

11 April 2006

siks dāz left

for assistance in how to read ZUMEL/zacanese, check out the first post here

yup, ţat's rīt, siks dāz, bābē. akşūulē, ōnlē fīv werking dāz, wiç mā tern owt tū bē for dāz (posiblē nō werk on sundā). lēving on ţe 17ţ, in ţ es ā on ţe 18ţ. ī kan't wāt. but it iz a bit ēzēer sins emu kām bak. it iz olwāz ēzēer wen a ā kumz bak. ţā bring delikusēz frum umārika. şe brot bak buswīzer, musterd (spīcē brawn, bēr/brot, and yelō), gormā çēzes frum amsterdam, and bēf jerkē. ī'l bē in heven ţe last fyū dāz ī'm hēr ţankz tū her. ţen it iz mī tern tū bring bak ţe gudēz. lāter ol.

10 April 2006

ī hav ā minut or tū

for assistance in how to read ZUMEL/zacanese, check out the first post here

it iz ţē end uv ţē şift and ī hav ā fyū minutz tū spār. wē had tū werk ā cupel uv owerz ōver tūnīt. ō, ū nō wut? ī'm gōing tū pūt ā cownter on hēr, sō ī'l hav tū gō for now. lāter.

unuţer dā of

for assistance in how to read ZUMEL/zacanese, check out the first post here

ţat'z tū sundāz in u rō. haw osum iz ţat? ī got tū slēp in, had ā fyū bērz, met up wiţ emu and ţe olstum tē āz tū gō tū ţe bēç. mūr on ţat ōver at nōmadik tendensēz. it'z tū muç tū rīt līk ţis.

but it wuz ā grāt dā of. naw bak tū ţe grīnd. ī'm not çeking for tīpōz ţis tīm bēcoz it iz lunç-tīm and ī'm starving. mābē ī'l çek it lāter.

08 April 2006

ţe ferst zūmel/zakunēz pōst in ţe blogusfēr

for assistance in how to read ZUMEL/zacanese, check out the first post here

sō hēr iz an īdēu uv wut zakunēz lūkz līk. it izn't pritē, but if enēwun kan lern simpil foniks, enēwun kan spēk ingliş. ţis tāks sum tīm, ēven for mē, tū tīp and tū rēd, but ī'm hōping ū stik urawnd for az long az ī hav ţe paşuns tu dū ţis. ţār wil bē tīpōs, ī'm şor, but ī'l dū mī best tū minimīz ţem in order tū māk lerning zakunēz a bit ēzēer. gūd luk, and plēz kum bak ugen.

in plain english

for assistance in how to read ZUMEL/zacanese, check out the first post here

ok, this is to help out anyone wondering what the hell is going to be going on on this site. i get bored. when i get bored, i think about weird things. several years back, i worked in turkmenistan and kazakhstan, russian speaking countries, and in my spare time i tried reading the language from signs, etc. with the locals to learn how to read cyrrilic. i was told even if i didn't know the word, i had excellent pronunciation. i must credit my lonely planet™ russian phrasebook and the russian language for being extremely phonetic.

if i do recall, phonics was being kinda phased out as i was growing up. unless i'm hallucinating madly, i remember my parents complaining about the new way children were taught to read without phonics. either way, it led me to re-evaluate the english language.

my being raised with english as my mother tongue gives me advantages and disadvantages. one advantage is that, apparently, english is one of the tougher languages to learn. it's a bastardization of numerous other languages thrown together. since these root languages differed, as the language solidified, rules were made, but with those rules came numerous exceptions; thus, an impure language had to deal with it's growing pains. how it became the language of global commerce, i'll never know. the disadvantage is since it is almost THE global language, i've been afforded the luxury of not needing to learn another language to travel the world to do my job.

still, this is my effort to help simplify the english language with phonics, removing redundant letters, and incorporating a few more efficient letters from other languages. from now on, all posts are going to be written in ZUMEL (title), or zacanese, for those of you who do not like acronyms. there is no capitalization in ZUMEL/zacanese, i prefer bold. the ZUMEL/zacanese alphabet consists of 32 letters, broken down into 19 consonants, 10 vowels, and 3 digraphs (or 'blends').

the consonants:
  1. b
  2. d
  3. f
  4. g
  5. h
  6. j
  7. ж (soft j like the 's' in closure)
  8. k
  9. l
  10. m
  11. n
  12. p
  13. r
  14. s
  15. t
  16. v
  17. w
  18. y
  19. z

the vowels (5 vowels, long and short types are explicit):
  1. ā, a
  2. ē, e
  3. ī, i
  4. ō, o
  5. ū, u

and the digraphs:
  1. ş = sh
  2. ç = ch
  3. ţ = th


this is a living language as i made it up only a few years ago and there's been very little beta testing besides working out some trivial flaws on a car trip with ChumpAssFool over at BTB **come to think of it, i think the roots of this go back to grade school when CAF and i wrote notes for PolGer**. if you can handle taking the time to forget what you know the word should look like, and just hear it, i'd appreciate any comments or words that can't be expressed very succintly. this isn't a language for comprehension, per se, as there will be many homographs. this language would be more based towards correct pronunciation.

i'm sure the updates won't be every day, but they should be one or two times a week since i have two other blogs i write for. i'll tweak the layout a little bit when i have the time. this is just a crazy side project. i made a language pack for windows so you TOO can type in zacanese, if you want it, i'll figure out a way to link it. i think there is a small glitch in it, but we'll have to see. this is the last post i'll be able to use the blogger spell check. let's see how this goes...